Maginel, you raise vitally important questions about the impact of the social other on our formation. I think James’ point is exactly the point you make, that the social other is not the most reliably accurate source for knowing ourselves. As a parent, I know that despite my best intentions I was not always there for my children in the way they needed me to be. Which is why James focuses on the reality of there being an Other other on whom we can rely, who loves us and even likes us more than we can know. As we learn to relax into the self we are receiving from the Other other, we are born again, re-created in God’s loving gaze.